How often do we consume or buy something, solicit a service, sign up for a subscription or spend our time on something without giving it a second thought, let alone run it through a quick yet conscious decision making process? Let me guess….you thought of buying a car or a house, but can you think of such a process for a smaller event such as watching another episode on Netflix, drinking another beer or glass of wine, browsing the web for 30-60 minutes without a clear intention? 

I am a massive fan of strategy but also a fan of quick and manageable solutions. This is not a strategy, it is a tactic. The strategy behind is “I will get to know myself and my choices better which will in turn streamline my life and help me make much smarter decisions.”

The tactic itself, I’ll get into the difference between tactic and strategy another time, is to implement a habit of always doing a quick check-in before you make a move.

Ask yourself for everything you buy, every service you solicit, everything subscription you sign up for, every activity you engage in…”Does it add value?”

If you make this your guiding principle, you will for sure improve your life. Your brain has to come up with a reason for doing it. The idea is to give space for doubts about a potentially bad decision which can also help with self-sabotage; more on that in a later article.

Example time. Let’s say you are supposed to finish a project, but you decided to watch a show on Netflix to relax you a bit. Before you watch the next episode, pause it, stand up in order to give your brain a jolt because a physical change can support a shift in activities and ask yourself “how does this add value?”. Of course, that way, one may argue, you’ll never do anything fun. That’s not the goal. The goal here is to get you to bring forth valid arguments. Let’s say you’ve been working on said project for 3-4 hours and you need a break. The argument “I need a quick break” is valid.

Objection: Well, that’s just going to have my brain rationalize every bad decision.

Yes, that can and will happen. However, slowly but surely you’ll see more objective arguments pop up and you’ll start making different decisions, those that support you in your endeavors. It’s not like someone else makes you do everything you want to achieve. Most of your intrinsic goals will be supported more and more often.

 It automatically adds value to your life. You are “being forced” to give a voice to the adult in you and set boundaries when it comes to the child in you which only wants joy. I want to be clear, the intention is not to silence that child in us, we genuinely need it, but within reason.

You hear that term a lot “adding value”. I use it all the time in coaching. It cuts through the BS, through the noise and it focuses on the truth. Is what you do, buy, ask for, need, want adding value to your life, your business, your work, your art, your craft, you relationship.

While we spend so much time doubting ourselves: “good enough”, “beautiful”, “wealthy enough”, “worthy” that’s just negative self-talk which is unproductive. I want to encourage you to spend a bit more time on a new habit that actually supports you in your whole life.

Whenever you brain comes up with a reason why you don’t have 10 seconds for this habit, remember a mission statement which could sound something like this: I will fast track my life by improving my decision making skills. This will have a massive impact on my life in the long run.

Remember, it gets easier each time, notice the difference and celebrate your wins.

Please send me an email if you have any questions, let me know how this is working for you and also if you have suggestions or objections.

Let’s talk.

Your coach, Philip.

If you can answer yes to any of these questions, this article might have a great impulse for you.
What is a dark horse? The term stems from horse racing back in the day and to this day. The term was coined for a horse nobody knows and the gambles would be unsure of placing their bets on. They provide better odds, but also carry more risks. Would you bet on a horse or any contender in a race without ever having them seen racing? No? Well, that is normal and quite wise.

But what if the dark horse is you?

Let’s imagine for a moment, that you are that dark horse. Nobody knows you, at least nobody knows your potential. You are, however, in this race with all the others. Whether you are a doctor, a teacher, a construction worker, a cashier or a stay-at-home parent. You are in competition with your peers – to which degree is up to you. 

It is easy to look at others who have outperformed the rest of us in our field, whatever that may be for you, but what if you tried something new? Enjoy being underestimated. Bathe in the fact that nobody thinks of you and how much more you have the chance to surprise them?

The element of surprise is the key element of this article. The effect of you coming out of that gate and surprising all of those who did not bet on you. Taking the analogy of the horse race again, the gambles would now pay very close attention to that new race horse – you.

But how to get there?

Do you want an example? Kim Kardashian. Wait, what? Why am I mentioning her? She has been underestimated by so many. Laughed off as a 15-minute-of-fame celebrity, but she is still around and not going anywhere soon. She took advantage of being a dark horse and eventually surprised us all, whether we like her or not. It is a story that, despite anyone’s opinion, can be a great source for inspiration. You can achieve anything, maybe even faster and easier by being laughed at, despised, underestimated. 

If you prepare, maybe even grind a bit and get ready before you get out of your box and start running, you might just enjoy that moment on the podium at the top, having surprised them all. Worst case scenario? You did your best and you are praising yourself and achieved something you never thought possible.

Go out there. Be a dark horse.

I would like to invite you to remind yourself of you strengths. I know, at first it feels silly starting a list of things you are good at or you like about yourself. Trust me, it is not. You are working on your self-image. Most likely you are underestimating yourself the most, but why do their work for them? Work on estimating yourself correctly. Stand tall in front of the mirror, ignore the negative thoughts that come to mind and just for once, play a little game with yourself and name only the good things you see. 

Positive thinking is debated here and there, while some love the law of attraction, others think of it as spiritual nonsense. Does it matter? I don’t have a definitive answer for you, but what I can tell you is, that a positive attitude towards yourself can become a habit. It is a muscle. So why not do a little habit building. Just for one week, do this exercise each morning, just you in front of a mirror and tell yourself your strengths and what you like about yourself. 

Get back to me and let me know what you noticed.

Until then, your coach Philip.

Wouldn’t that be great? You read this article and figure out the secret and solution to everything? Well, it might be sobering to hear, but I have an idea…

These days, we spent hours online and we are bombarded with ads and call to actions all circulating around one thing: THE solution. The magic button, the ONE THING you have to do in order to rid yourself of excess weight, procrastination, addictions, and even uncontrollable elements such as “how to make everybody fall in love with you”. We live in a society where the quick fix seems everywhere and ever present. But does it exist?

Well, in certain circumstances it might. You will get tired quickly setting up furniture without a power drill. Simple problem – simple solution. For anything else more complex and of value to you, such as your life, your health, your love-life, the solution might be equally complex and require a thorough approach. Many of our everyday “issues” have been with us for months, even years and we have battled them countless times, right? This is not a scientific argumentation but how much sense does it make that you have pondered something over and over again and someone else now has the solution to your problem and it requires zero or minimal effort on your part. It is unlikely I would say. 

Let’s use a very common example – productivity. Many of us are struggling to make the deadline, juggle work and our social lives and follow all those recommendations of regular workout, meditation, etc. Do this, do that, but if you do THIS ONE THING you will be liberated from all your worries. Sounds a bit too good to be true. So why not try an old idea with a new approach? Work. Not hard but smart. When we hear work or hard work even, we tend to get demotivated. It is easy to go into a new year’s resolution and list a million things you want to do. Just start, don’t think about it. Well, I would say there is some truth to that, but instead of overthinking which won’t help you reach your goal, you might still want to consider way to make sure you work smart, not hard.  

Another example might be all too familiar. You gained a few extra pounds over the holidays or while you were stressed at work. Your new year’s resolution or new goal is to go to the gym and work out really hard very often. You imagine yourself at the end of your goal. The sobering realization will come all too quickly when you are on the treadmill in week 4 and you discover that it is hard work.

What to do? Well, I would suggest you start by researching weight loss and find out which body type you are. You might come across a few articles telling you that it is not just workout but also diet. You then go on to find which exercises you might like. Getting a fitness coach who will help you devise a plan and a strategy are also expensive but bound to get your the results you were looking for. The quick fix might be some processed foods in the form of shakes and some silly device promising to slim you down while you watch Netflix. Of course, the latter would be great, but if they worked we would all be using them. 

The downsides if you are chasing that quick-fix are most likely frustration due to false promises, thus a lack of motivation and also a bit of money. Quick fixes rarely come cheap. If  worse when you think about the effect.

In the example above there are 3 solutions. One, the quick fix, not yielding results and costing you money. Two, you try it yourself and work hard, without a plan and guidance or the necessary knowledge and skills. Option three is the true solution (of course only in my opinion) as it requires actual work and dedication, but making it as EFFICIENT as possible. You will get to your goal, but faster and smarter, staying motivated and on track. 

So what is the secret then?

Baby steps. The word is not very motivating, but Usain Bolt also started with baby steps, when he was a baby and when he trained to become an athlete. He has coaches too. He works smart.

Your coach, Philip.